The question “how do you follow your dreams?” and “how did you become a full time writer?” and “how did you manage to work on Broadway?” have come up regularly, both at in-person events (pre-plague) and in virtual chats and events.

I answer honestly, and no one ever likes the answer. It makes them squirm. Then they come up with all the reasons why they “can’t” but still want the result without making the hard choices and putting in the work.

Prep yourself for the tough love answer you might claim is “impossible.”

The answer is both simple and difficult: Always put your own work first.

If you are an artist, be it a writer, a painter, an actor, a dancer, whatever, your own work must ALWAYS come first. ALWAYS.

Putting the work first doesn’t mean being a selfish bastard and expecting everyone else to martyr themselves to you because you are Such a Great Artist, although that’s how it’s often portrayed (and white men, in particular, have thrived on that model). It doesn’t mean ignoring your friends and family, not having a life, never having a vacation, and living in poverty. Which again, is a popular trope, meant to prevent people from following their dreams and keep them chained to soul-sucking jobs.

It means setting boundaries, and having honest discussions with the people with whom you share your life about physical and emotional space to create, no interruptions when you’re working, sharing household and emotional labor, etc. It means making choices looking at the big picture, which sometimes means giving up something for the moment in the smaller picture. Instead of sitting on the couch watching your boyfriend play video games because he “wants the company” you work on your novel. Maybe you can find a way to work companionably together in the same room.  Or maybe you hang out with him tonight, but tomorrow you have uninterrupted work time. But you don’t let anyone make you an appendage for their convenience when you need to be the central focus on your own work.  It means the creative passion is the overwhelming drive in your soul.

Any “day job” I’ve ever had only existed to serve the work. Any day job that got in the way of the work, or expected to be prioritized over the work, was replaced as quickly as possible by a different job that didn’t make those demands. Whenever I got a paying job in my field, I quit the day job. Because when the show or film ended, there’s always another day job. But there isn’t always another chance to create your art. Because if you consistently say no because of “the day job” and “responsibilities” people stop asking. They know you can’t/don’t want to, and don’t want to make you or themselves feel bad or frustrated by asking over and over again, and with a negative response. They also don’t have any reason to believe you will follow through on your commitment if you say yes. You have to earn that trust.

Theatre, film, dance, music, and the performing arts are especially demanding. The hours and the schedule are hard. You work so others can play. You work nights, weekends, and holidays. Unless you’re on a stable, long-running production, you don’t get to take time off to go to your kid’s recital or have a Friday night dinner out with your partner. You are WORKING. It is your JOB. It’s not a cute lil hobby you can pick up and put down when it’s convenient.

You show up and do the work.

EVERY workday.

You build the other parts of your life around the work.

Plenty of corporate jobs demand the same thing, and that’s seen as being dedicated, ambitious, and hardworking. Yet if an artist does the same thing, it’s demeaned. Because it’s inconvenient to the corporate machine and “not real work.”

Babe, try being on your feet for eighteen hours on location in the pouring rain and keeping continuity on soaking wet actor clothes. It’s WORK.

If you’re not willing to put your own work first, then you will have a different type of career. There’s nothing wrong with loving your day job and creating your art “on the side” if that’s what serves your life better. But you will have a different career trajectory.

If you want to move from it being “on the side” and into your art being your full-time career, you have to treat it as a second job and devote as much or more time and energy to it as you do to any day job. It’s another job until it’s your only job, and you will have to straddle two careers until you made a leap in one direction or another. You will need to use vacation time and weekends and other off-day-job times to do the work, to go to conferences, retreats, workshops, etc., rather than having a real vacation, until you’ve switched careers.

If you want to create as a hobby, that’s great, too. You get to do it whenever you make the time for it. You will have a different trajectory for your work than those who’ve made the choices above.  There will be plenty of opportunities you have to refuse, because you are unwilling to rearrange your life in order to accept them. That’s okay, as long as you get out of the way of those who are committed to doing it as their profession as well as their passion, and don’t undermine them every chance you get.

Whatever choices you make about where your art fits into your life is your decision. But if you want it to be a full-time career, then you have to make the choices that support that decision. Those include:

–Putting the work first.

–Showing up every designated workday and doing the work.

–Supporting other artists by spreading the word on their work, showing up at events for them (when it’s safe and appropriate), and buying whatever you can afford when you can afford it.

–Always learning more about your art and your craft, and stretching, so you evolve as an artist.

–Learning the business side of your chosen discipline. Again, the “flaky artist” is a trope promoted to demean artists and make sure money is funneled elsewhere. Every successful artist I’ve ever met has been business-savvy. When they were in a position to hire someone else to deal with it, they CHOSE to do so. But they damn well were capable of doing the work themselves.

–Learn the tech. As an actor or dancer or musician, if you’re part of a production, understand what the crew does. As any kind of artist, learn how to work on a computer, build a website, handle social media. It’s become part of the job. “I’m not a tech person” is a bullshit excuse. I’m certainly not a tech person, plenty of my friends aren’t tech people, but we sat down and learned. You don’t have to be an IT genius to learn the basics. You DO have to be able to maintain an internet presence. People can’t support your work if they don’t know about it or can’t find it.

–Document your work. Keep notes, photos, and other documentation on your projects in various stages. Keep a clip file of articles, interviews, reviews. It will help you with grant proposals, pitches, speaking engagements, teaching, conferences, networking, and all kinds of other opportunities. This is something too many people drop the ball on, and it bites them in the butt.

–Advise, mentor, and share, but don’t allow wanna-bes and energy vampires to guilt you into prioritizing their work over yours. It’s one thing to advise and mentor; it’s another to do someone else’s work for them, instead of teaching them how to do it. The whole “you owe me” that aspiring artists often use to get a foot in the door (and then can’t maintain anything beyond that foot) hurts your own work. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries.

–Build in time to do nothing. Rest and down time matter.  Sometimes sitting and staring at the wall or a mountain is a vital part of creation. A change of scenery, time off, doing something completely different, are all vital to refilling the creative well. This is the most difficult when you’re trying to move from the day job into the fulltime artistic profession, but try to build that time in, and then, once you’ve made the transition, build that time in regularly.

Remember that anyone who tells you “can’t make a living” being an artist has their own agenda to prevent you from doing it. It may come out of their own choices, fears, and hurts, but they are saboteurs, and you need to distance yourself (especially if they claim they’re saying so “for your own good”).

Even in this treacherous climate, it’s possible to make a living as an artist. But you have to want it enough, and be willing to make the choices and take the chances to make it happen.

It’s not easy.

It is worth it, but it has to be your driving passion.

Amongst the many pandemic lessons we’ve learned about work, many of us have learned what work resonates more with us, or which doesn’t. At times, we haven’t had much choice – we have to take what work we can land in order to keep a roof over our heads. That’s often exhausting, and it leaves little time or energy for pursuing the work that is fulfilling as well as keeping you alive in a monetary sense.

Being versatile is always positive. In spite of all the screaming about the importance of “niche” – the wider your range of skills and interests, the wider the range of potential jobs. You’ll notice that several of the self-styled job-coaching and marketing gurus have stopped screaming “niche” and talked about “side hustle.” They don’t admit they were wrong, or that life changes, or that people NEED to change. They simply change their tunes and collect the cash.

I find “side hustle” a revolting and insulting term. The minute someone uses “side hustle,” I look at them differently and with suspicion.

There are two reasons for that.

The first is that no one should HAVE to work more than one job in order to survive. The reality is that most of us do work multiple jobs. Let’s stop this toxic myth that the necessity for a “side hustle” is a good thing. Pay people a living wage, and make sure there’s enough housing and food for everyone. That is absolutely achievable in this country, with ethical leadership. Encouraging “side hustle” encourages yet more low-paying jobs without benefits.

If you can’t afford to pay a living wage, you don’t get to have employees. Do the damn work yourself.

The second reason I loathe “side hustle” is that, to me, the “hustle” part of it doesn’t mean “extra work and resourceful time management.” To me, the “hustle” means “fraud or swindle.” So when someone talks about their “side hustle” I immediately associate it with them feeling they must swindle because they aren’t being paid enough at their central job.

Negative connotations all around. People with different frames of reference will interpret the phrase differently. But to me, it reads as “it’s okay for me to find a way to screw you outside of my job to earn money, because my regular job doesn’t pay me enough to survive.”

Work has to serve workers better (and, by doing so, will serve both companies and society better).

But what if you are in a job that IS paying you enough to survive, but you hate it? But you have a passion for something else?

Then, absolutely, pursue it.

When I teach writing workshops, and people ask me how they can “find” the time to write and become a full-time writer, I tell them, “There will never BE time to write. You have to MAKE time to write. If you want it badly enough, you find a way to do it. If you want this to be your only job, you commit to it as though it is a second job, until you’re in a position to make it your only job.”

It means you’ll be tired. A lot. It means you’ll give up time on other things, and sometimes with other people. It means you have to negotiate with those in your life, and decide how important this second passion is in relation to those people. Some will compromise with you and support you. Some will not, and then you have to decide whether or not to keep them in your life.

It doesn’t have to be writing – it can be any passion. How much do you love it? How much do you want it to be your only job? Are you worried you will stop loving it if it becomes your source of income?

Remember, though, that loving your work does not mean you forfeit your right to get paid.

One of the most toxic myths presented to and about creative people is that they “do it for love, not money.” Those are not mutually exclusive, and it is a way for those who don’t have the guts to follow their dreams to punish those who do.

Don’t buy into it.

The pandemic made us more aware of our wants and needs. I hope, as we get vaccinated, and move into the next phases of our lives (because it will not go back to the way it was), we take some of those lessons and implement them, especially when it comes to work.

I already see companies reverting back to toxic models, and, especially, recruiters doing so. It’s up to the workers to refuse to be forced back into those negative patterns.

How do you move the passionate work you do outside your normal job to become your only job?

Hard work, time, money, patience.

Most of us, too many of us, live paycheck to paycheck. So all those “experts” talking about “paying yourself first” and “saving a year and a half’s worth of expenses” – they can shove it right up the you-know-what because that is simply not a reality for most of us.

You need to learn how to contain and direct your energy. You still need to deliver high quality at the place that pays you to survive, but you do not put all your energy there. You save energy for your passion-work.

Biorhythms were a big deal back when I entered the work force. It’s considered a “pseudo-science” and therefore unreliable. But there are elements of that system that ring true. I am at my most creative early in the morning. That is when I do my first 1K of the day, when I write most of my fiction, or work on whatever project needs the most creative attention. Once that is done, I can then direct my energy to other projects, depending on contract deadlines and payment. But that early morning creative time is MINE, and I use it as I choose.

Other people work better late at night. Or in the afternoon. Play with it. Find your strongest time to do what you love, and then, slowly, steadily, rework your schedule so you can use that time. If you’re working 9-5, you may have to do your passion-work early in the morning or late at night, when it’s not your best time. You may have to work when you’re tired. Until you can convert your work schedule to fit your creative rhythms.

Don’t kill yourself with it, but also, don’t give up. Do the work. Create a body of work. Increase your skills.

And remember, that no one, NO ONE will respect your work and your time unless YOU do, and unless you hold firm boundaries.

Then, start exploring how you can use that body of work and increased skill set to earn money. Build the income from it.

If it’s in a field that has the possibilities of grants of other award funding – look into it, and apply for anything and everything for which you think are appropriate. Remember, no matter how many people apply for a grant, it’s always 50-50. Either you get it, or you don’t. Grants and other award funding can buy you time to focus on your passion-work. That time allows you to create more that then positions you better for your transition to doing it full-time. It is worth the time it takes to write the grants.

Once you’re earning steadily in this second, passion-work, enough to feel a little more secure, talk to your regular job about adjusted hours, reduced hours, remote work, or anything else that is appropriate, works for both of you, and lets you spend more time on this second work. If you’re in a benefitted job, negotiate to keep benefits.

As your passion-work becomes more financially stable, you can cut back more on what was your “day job” until you can leave. Or maybe you can work out an arrangement to do freelance work a few times a month, so there’s still some money coming in, but now THAT is your second job (and you don’t need to devote the time or energy to it that you needed to give your passion-work in order to place that front and center).

Some of the work we must do with this new administration is make sure that our health care is not tied to our jobs. It keeps too many of us in toxic situations.

Again, in the faction of those not wanting to pay a living wage, there are the shouts of “it’s all going to be automated soon, you should be grateful” and “no one wants to do this work.”

So why aren’t the jobs “no one wants to do” the jobs being automated? They could be. A robot doesn’t care what the job is. The robot will do the job as programmed. So program them to “do the jobs no one wants” and keep people in the jobs that need to be human, and pay those humans a living wage.

There’s political work we need to do in order to break the toxic culture that too many grew up with couched as “solid work ethic” and there’s the work we need to do to move the work we love into the work that supports us on financial as well as emotional levels.

The great part of this is that there are so many different passions and interests and skills that there are plenty of passionate artists AND plenty of passionate accountants. We don’t all love and want the same work, and that’s part of what makes it both possible and positive to pursue the work we love.

What we have to change is the structure and strictures of work that only serve a small portion of those “in charge” – who are not the people doing the actual work. We do this on individual levels, by doing the actual work we love, and we do this at the ballot box. We do it by communicating with our elected officials.

It is the personification of “Be the change you want in the world.”

How are you following your passions? How do you plan to move them, so they support your life on both physical and emotional levels?